One of the biggest problems that many of us Americans have is relationships. To this, there are so many advice columns available out there: on the internet, in magazines, on popular YouTube channels – all of them in the effort to educate us on how to have more meaningful relationships with our loved ones. Believe it or not, the divorce rate here is at around 50% – a number that’s pretty disturbing. And if you see signs that your relationship is going sour, you’ve come to the right place.
Except we aren’t really going to give you your typical relationship advice. What we offer you is some of the best information on how to improve your relationships – according to expert scientists.
- Relationships as safe havens. A relationship is one of the few places where you can feel safe. When we aren’t connected with our partners, we start to feel lonely. And when they don’t respond to us, or threatens us with a breakup, our brains react similarly as if we were in real, physical danger. This is because we’ve evolved in a way that makes us dependent on our partners. After all, securing a mate is essential to ensure another generation of offspring.To this, we should be wary of threatening the overall integrity of a relationship, especially when we are arguing or fighting with our partners. Give your partner the feeling that you’re there no matter what. Then again, don’t be a doormat either.
- Share emotions. It’s essential that when you’re in a relationship to share emotions. If you’re not, then there’s something wrong going on. In the most successful relationships, it’s found that when one is feeling stressed, the other one is too. When one experiences bliss, so does the other. It’s our brain’s way of creating empathy – allowing us to feel what others feel, which is quite important for closeness.This also means that whenever they’re feeling out of the mood, it’s your responsibility to make them feel better. With their emotional state highly affecting you, even you would benefit from peace.
- Watch your non-verbal communication. Often the cause for fallouts in a relationships is miscommunication. Have you ever asked your loved one, “what’s wrong?” simply because of their actions? Our brains are hardwired to try to understand and make sure that our partner is safe. This also goes back to keeping them happy. Giving out the wrong gestures and body language may lead your partner to make conclusions that might be false, leading to disputes.
Remember, love happens in the brain, not in the heart. When you are able to understand the underlying emotions associated to love, and the psychology behind all of it, you can slowly turn your relationship around for the better, and step-by-step, create a deep, more meaningful connection.